Just saving this...not important..not ed related

david_phan911@hotmail.com a dit (13:43)　:
I love you...
Érica dit :
sorry i didnt have any connection
David_[Ninja!] dit :
ok
Érica dit :
yeah
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I dont want you to be sad and i want to know i do love you
Érica dit :
ok
David_[Ninja!] dit :
its not fun having you saying something you want and the next thing you wanted something else
Érica dit :
its not only that you fell asleep that made me feel like you didnt love me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
what does falling alseep do anything me loving you?
Érica dit :
we we're alone, it never happens..and all you wanted to do was sleep..i was tierd too, but being with you was more important..but then i couldnt sleep because you didnt give a crap about being with me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I was with you in the same bed
Érica dit :
sleeping
David_[Ninja!] dit :
so?
why did you just sleep with me too
or just say something about it
Érica dit :
so, i could have not been there, it would not had made any diffrence
David_[Ninja!] dit :
then just stay quiet all night and just complain while im sleeping
Érica dit :
you we're super grumpy when i talked
David_[Ninja!] dit :
yeah, cause im was SLEEPING
Érica dit :
k
David_[Ninja!] dit :
you couldve talk about somethhing before i actually went to bed
Érica dit :
it wouldant had make any diffrence..you just wanted to sleep
David_[Ninja!] dit :
no it wouldve made a difference
Érica dit :
yeah right
David_[Ninja!] dit :
whatever
stop acting such a drama girl
Érica dit :
stop being such an ass hole
David_[Ninja!] dit :
ok
Érica dit :
ok
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I'm sorry ok
Érica dit :
ok
David_[Ninja!] dit :
yeah
Érica dit :
yeah
David_[Ninja!] dit :
why didnt you had anything to say to me when i asked you?
Érica dit :
i told you yesterday
i told you why yesterday*
David_[Ninja!] dit :
ok
Érica dit :
ok
David_[Ninja!] dit :
are you always waiting for me to say something? you can say something too
Érica dit :
i have nothing to say
David_[Ninja!] dit :
ok
Érica dit :
your not going to try to make things better between us, right?
or was saying sorry was enough for you?
David_[Ninja!] dit :
why do you keep saying that
seriously
Érica dit :
i dont keep saying that
i said it wtcie
twice*
David_[Ninja!] dit :
yes you do
Érica dit :
and it's true..you wont do anything
David_[Ninja!] dit :
what do you want me to do? oh please tell me
im SO scare im going to make you cry
Érica dit :
fuck you

Just another bad day...

Érica dit :
hi
David_[Ninja!] dit :
hi
Érica dit :
what are you doing?
David_[Ninja!] dit :
just took a shower
Érica dit :
ok
are you busy? ..
David_[Ninja!] dit :
no
Érica dit :
ok
David_[Ninja!] dit :
why?
Érica dit :
i was just asking
David_[Ninja!] dit :
oki
Érica dit :
I wanted to stay with me =(
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I'm sorry
why didnt just say so?
Érica dit :
i didnt want to make you walk
David_[Ninja!] dit :
ok
Érica dit :
your not the type that would enjoy making sacrafices for me and i know you didnt want to walk back
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I love you alot
Érica dit :
i love you too
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I told you i wouldnt have mind
Érica dit :
you we're not too convincing
David_[Ninja!] dit :
ok
Érica dit :
ok
David_[Ninja!] dit :
what are you doing?
Érica dit :
nothing
you?
David_[Ninja!] dit :
looking at my university things
Érica dit :
ok
I feel like you don't love me alot sometimes..
David_[Ninja!] dit :
i do love you
I dont like it when you just have things to say at the last minute
why cant you ever just tell me
Érica dit :
at the last minute?
David_[Ninja!] dit :
yes, i go to sleep and you say things like you dont love me
Érica dit :
it was the only time we got to be alone
David_[Ninja!] dit :
well lastnight i told you i was tierd and you said yourself you were tierd as well, i wanted to go to sleep and then you get all sad just because im going to sleep
why coulnt you just say you wanted to talk or something
Érica dit :
yes, I wanted to spend time with you, we're never just me and you
i always felt we we're going to break up when university started..u'll just ignore me more and more...before you enjoyed being with me now you dont want to do anything, i feel like your not attracted to me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
i am attracted to you alot. ever since ive been hanging out with you and other people you just diss me infront of everyone
Érica dit :
because your not nice to me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
iam nice to you
Érica dit :
and all of a sudden i got very bothered about being bigger than you
your not in love with me
how could you be alone with someone you love that much and just want to sleep?
David_[Ninja!] dit :
why are you being mad about me being tierd at 3am?
im alloud to be sleepy
and its not something i decide to be tierd
Érica dit :
you dont love me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I do love you
stop saying that line
Érica dit :
but i feel that way
and it makes me not want to be with you sometimes
im never able to sleep well because i think you dont love me
you dont show it, its like you dont care
you dont want to spend time alone with me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
i do
ive been nice to you alot and all you said: youre so gay gay gay gay
fuck off
stop it
Érica dit :
you dont want to be with me...you like to be with other people..after this week university starts and i know you wont have time for us
David_[Ninja!] dit :
thats all you ever say to me for these past days
Érica dit :
i never told you fuck off
David_[Ninja!] dit :
why is it always with ME
you have courses at night
why you always blaming me
Érica dit :
i told you plently of times that i love you...but it seems it dosent matter to you
because I know you won't make any effort what so ever to be with me
we we're just in high school and YOU never had time to see me outside school
David_[Ninja!] dit :
why dont you ever try to be with me
because you never do
lazy ass
always want other people to things instead
Érica dit :
im not insulting you when im trying to tell you something..
David_[Ninja!] dit :
yeah right
Érica dit :
ok
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I love you
Érica dit :
yeah right
you never have anything to say about anything..calling me a lazy ass when i feel like you dont love me is not helping things..
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I DO TALK
I told you so lastnight
you NEVER TELL ME ANYTHING
Érica dit :
I tell you everything
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I even ask you if you have anything to say and you reply: no
and now you do?
Érica dit :
i cant when your with me because we dont spend alot of time together and it would just ruin it and you would get mad and it makes me too nervous
and i know you would never try to make things better because you think im the only problem between us
i try to make things better everytime i talk to you here..
it just dosent work..
David_[Ninja!] dit :
ok
Érica dit :
it took you all that time to come up with ''ok'' obvisouly you dont give a crap about what i was saying
David_[Ninja!] dit :
why are you always so grumpy everytime i answer you god damnit
Érica dit :
i might as well go to bed, i worried you didnt love me..but im pretty sure you dont now
David_[Ninja!] dit :
why are you beign such a ''know it all'
I do love you
Érica dit :
k..
David_[Ninja!] dit :
yeah
Érica dit :
so, i tell you that i seriously think you dont love me and all you have to say about it is that im a know it all
do you care for me at all?
nvm
David_[Ninja!] dit :
ok...
Érica dit :
it took you 3 mins..so i figured you didnt
there are just things that are more important to do right now than talking to me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
Why are you being so aggressive for everytime i go on my laptop
oh yeah, liek you dont go on other stuff
bullshit
*like\
Érica dit :
because,I dont think you love me
not when im talking to you about something important
David_[Ninja!] dit :
im sure
Érica dit :
your doing nothing to show me that you do love me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
i hanged out with you, i made love to you in bed ,i say i love you and youre saying i dont do anything to love you
and sometimes i think you just wanted sex from me
Érica dit :
lol, we had sex for 30 seconds and you fell asleep
saying i love you every once in a while is not enough
David_[Ninja!] dit :
i dont say it once and a while
''thats the biggest lie in history''
oh wow
Érica dit :
huh?
ok..let me rephrase that...JUST saying I love you, is not enough
You make me feel alone even when our with me, and not cared for..its like im just there to entertain you
and sometimes i do feel like i love you just for sex because its the only time that you are sweet and nice to me for a while and that we get along, its the only time that i feel like you love me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
I always love you
Érica dit :
ok..
i love you too
David_[Ninja!] dit :
Érica dit :
just making sure you got all this...because you dont seem to mind
Érica dit :
huh?
ok..let me rephrase that...JUST saying I love you, is not enough
You make me feel alone even when our with me, and not cared for..its like im just there to entertain you
and sometimes i do feel like i love you just for sex because its the only time that you are sweet and nice to me for a while and that we get along, its the only time that i feel like you love me
haves it REALLY NOT gotten to you that I DO feel like you DON'T love me, I'm not lying and I don't want to be with you if you keep on making me feel like that.
ignoring it and sending me little hearts dosent make me feel any better about us
David_[Ninja!] dit :
ignoring what?
stop being such a bitch to me when youre talking off MSN with me
Érica dit :
what i just told you and that i think you dont love me
David_[Ninja!] dit :
WHATEVEVER GO TO SLEEP
Érica dit :
ok..so if i be a bitch to you in real life...will you belive me?
David_[Ninja!] dit :
i dont want to talk to you for the night
Érica dit :
im not being a bitch...if you could see pass that..i do mean what im telling you
GO you for making me feel loved -_-
I hate you

Uni -day 04

It seems it's so easy to be losing track of time here.
I don't really like it, I don't know anyone here yet and it feels terribly lonely. I don't think I've ever felt this troubled. I have spend almost all day sleeping and crying, all the days just have been looking like all the other days.

My internet connection dosent work when I'm in my room,
So I have to go upstair to be able to post on here.

Well, on the better side
I have lost weight since I moved here
I've been exercising alot and no one here ever tells me to eat
And it's great
It's the only good thing that happend since I moved here.

So..Yeah
I'll talk to you peoples laterz
<3

Stay Strong ^^

Perfection day 03

I'm moving tomorrow, I advanced my moving date of a day, yet again.
I see it as a fresh new start, it should be enough for me to find the strengh to do this

garlic fingers
rice crispies

I'll be packing for the rest of the day

Perfection day 01

So, I'm moving in 4 days

I'm starting university in 3 weeks and I want to look flawless. In four days i'm going to go live at my cousin's for a week. Me and her used to be very close a few years back, we took some distance when she moved away but now that i'll be movin close to her we're bonding again. I really like it, we used to be eachother's thinsperation. We would exercise all the times. Shes a really great person.

I'll exercise alot in those four days and in the week I spend at my cousin's, I'll come back home for 2-3 days then I'm moving for good a whole week before university starts so I'll exercise there too.

I've gained weight this past year and I can't let that happen to me. I'm too strong to become a fat, ugly and lazy person. I'm going to be thin and beutiful, pretty and talented. Everyone is going to enevy me and my perfecction. I'm going to keep track of my quest to perfection here. You girls out there want it too, very few make it there. Only the strongest do.

I had 2 pop tarts and a boal of noodles today. That's horrible, I really should not be eating that much food if I want to lose weight in 3 weeks. I have to work out 1000 calories today. If theres any girls out there that are on their quest to perfection too, you can always message me. We have to be strong to make it, stronger than all the others girls. We have more will power, we deserve to be thin

You want to wear those skinny jeans someday, work for it.

Food journal

I'll also be keeping track of everything I eat in this blog.

Today I had a boal of oatmeal-260 cal

Tonight dad is having a bbq, I don't know what I'll eat yet, so I'll edit this post tonight if anything

Just today

What am I going to do to get thin today?

Today I'm going to go for a walk
Do 32 minutes worth of 8mins workout videos
Jump rope for 10 mins
Work out in the home gym for 25 mins
Do 20 min of boot camp

What am I going to do for myself today?

Rent a movie I want to see
Write a nice letter to my boyfriend
Dance to silly thecno music(It always boosts up my mood)
Start reading a book
Star a new piece of art work

I belive it's important to do things for yourself everyday
Just so you don't lose yourself